Once upon a time in the land of Noodleville, lived a girl who took the “just wing it approach” too many times and entered into breeding season quite unprepared.
The air grew crisp, the leaves started to fall, the does started to cycle and there was no buck to call. No rank, musky stench on the air, and this poor gal was starting to despair….
Alright y’all, poetry isn’t really my strong suit, but ya get the gist of what I was trying to say.
It’s fall, I had no buck. Well, actually, I own a Nubian buck, the uber handsome Mr. Rocco, but he didn’t have a companion, so when he entered into the “man goat” phase of his life around 6 months old, I sent him to work for a friend until I needed him…
Sweet baby Rocco before he turned into a “Man Goat”…
My dilemma was I needed a LAMANCHA buck, as that is my primary focus, and yet, here I sat with no earless boy to my name, and no true prospect in sight.
Just as I was getting frantically paranoid thinking of all the Numanchas I might get stuck with, along came an offer from a good friend and it was one I just couldn’t pass up.
Of course, as these things usually go, the timing was wrong, but I’m nothing if not determined, so I set out to make it happen at any cost. My dilemma was transportation. The big Ford truck had the welding rig set up on it with no room for goat hauling, and hubby’s schedule didn’t allow for him to remove it for me in a timely manner…
My car is a lil SUV… A Dodge Nitro that looks like a roller-skate.
Yup.... I really was too lazy to snap a pic of my car so I stole a pic from Google…
Not an ideal animal transporter by any means, but I figured “What the heck, I’ve stuffed a goat in here before, why not do it again?”
Why not eh……? Well, I’ll answer that question for ya.
In the past, I shoved babies in crates in there and even an older doe… On tarps of course, and it worked well…. But this…. This happened to be a 3 year old, fully grown Lamancha buck, in full rut, in all his pee stained, musky glory.
Before I could ponder too hard on the ramifications of this move I was about to do, I wrapped everything in the car in tarps and took off down the road. A short 2 hours later, I arrive at Lynne’s ready to pick up Mr. Tall, Hairy & Stinky, also known as Avatar.
I hop out of the car as Lynne eyes my ride with a bit of doubt, and humorous disbelief…
“You’re going to put him in there?”
Yup…
“Will he fit?”
I can squish him if I have to… Desperation is a great motivator and I’ve worked too hard on collecting the Lamanchas I have to waste an entire year on “Numancha” mutt kids..
Lynne was kind enough to give me a tour of all her lovely animals……I may have fallen in love with a particular Alpine doe that I shouldn’t have since I’m supposed to be focusing on my Lamanchas, and I got to learn a new goatie skill as well….
I’ve been curious about trimming feet with an angle grinder, so Lynne pulled out hers and did Avatar’s feet for me before we loaded him up… Pretty spiffy, and I can’t wait to give it a go on my own…
Anywho… Now comes the loading part… Avatar is such a sweet, mellow boy…Walked right up to the car, but convincing him to hop into the confined world of plastic just wasn’t happening.
So, I grabbed a front leg, Lynne grabbed a front leg…
She then held him half way in while I went around, hung upside down over the back seat and pulled while she shoved the rear…. This lil acrobatic feat was followed by a swiftly closing door and I swear I could still hear Lynne laughing at the absurdity of the whole fiasco as I drove away with a smug look on my face.
Ok, ok… I’ll be honest… I’m not sure if I was actually wearing a “smug” look, or if my face was just contorted in disgust over the overwhelming, extremely pungent smell threatening to choke me out as I drove….… But none the less, I had a buck, a beautiful buck, with genetics I greatly admired, riding comfortably and quietly in the back of my car…
Rank smell be damned, I made it work and I was happy!!
I hit Dallas traffic at dark, trucking on along imagining what kids I’d get and what I thought they’d look like when my happy musings were interrupted by the flashing red and blues in my rear view mirror..
Well crap!
Pull over, get all the necessities gathered up and wait for the officer to approach…
The Officer peers into my window with his flashlight as I roll it down and he leans in, with partial words leaving his mouth before he interrupts himself with:
Officer: “Woah!!!!!!!...... Ma’am……. are you feeling well?!?!”
This statement was said with such genuine concern as he reeled backwards away from the pungent stench wafting from my car that I couldn’t help but to laugh…
“Yes sir officer, I’m feeling quite well, I’m just hauling a buck home and he’s a bit smelly”
Officer: “A buck??”
“Yes sir, a buck, a goat, he’s laying in the back, let me show you”
At this point, I roll down the driver side rear window and he peaks inside with his flashlight with a very doubtful look on his face…… You see, Avatar had made himself quite cozy and was laying down, out of sight, behind the seat…. You could just tell by the look on the poor officer’s face that he was highly doubting my sanity…. Not to mention he was wondering what awful medical condition I was suffering from to be emitting such a horrible smell and making up weird stories…
Just as the kind officer was about to question me, Avatar popped his stinky, earless head in all its golden bearded glory over the seat and said “Ehh-ehh-ehh”
I think Avatar has a sense of humor….lol
The startled officer jumped back and exclaimed “Holy crap, what the hell is that?!?!” as he eased in slowly for another look..
“I told you, it’s a buck, a goat, a Lamancha, I’m taking him home to breed my does”
Officer: “I’m sorry ma’am, that’s no goat, THAT looks like something off of Star Wars!”
To be fair, I GET the comparison he was trying to make, though it is a Stargate the movie creature he was thinking of, and not a Star Wars creature…. Of course Avatar is pretty, while the creature is quite hideous and only shares a vague resemblance..
He stares… looks at me, takes another look at Avatar, and while keeping his eye on Avatar, he ask me for my DL and insurance…. I couldn’t help but wonder if he was afraid the smelly beast would jump out and get him or what, but his reaction was absolutely priceless.
As he heads back to his car with my info, it dawned on me that throughout this entire exchange, I still had no clue why I was being pulled over…. Apparently the same thought dawned on him once he was away from Avatar, and so he returned my stuff and got down to business..
Officer: “Ma’am, are you aware that your insurance and DL have different addresses?”
“Yes sir, I just moved not too long ago and keep forgetting to change the address on my DL..”
Officer: “Your DL says “Noodle”…. I’ve never heard of it? That even a real town?”
“Well of course it’s a real town! I used to live there, you can Google it, and just to let you know how bonafide legit this town is, there’s even a blog about it online!”
Officer: “Who on earth would blog about a town called Noodle?”
“Me of course”
To this he laughs and says “Ok, ok, how to do I find this blog about this town of Noodle?”
So, I write down the address on the back of an old receipt and hand it to him…
Officer: “BTW- Did you know you were speeding? That’s why I pulled you over this evening.”
“No sir officer, I was not aware I was speeding… But I gotta ask you something….”
Officer: “What’s that?”
“Wouldn’t you be speeding too if you were locked up with this stench?!?!?!”
To this his busted out laughing and said: “Why yes ma’am, I do believe I would! I’ll give you this warning if you promise to watch your speed for the rest of the trip home, perhaps try cracking a window so you can survive and drive the speed limit…”
I thanked him, an Officer Daniels according to the written warning I received, and as a parting salute I told him to watch my blog as he was about to become a famous feature here at “The Adventures of Noodleville”.
As a farewell greeting he said: “You know, I’ve been a cop for the last 9 years, and I have to say this takes the cake for the weirdest traffic stop I’ve ever made, thanks for the laugh Noodle”
Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
Happy to oblige Officer Daniels, and thanks so much for not making this foul fetching an expensive endeavor by adding a speeding ticket to it!
Now that you know the story of his arrival, I must gush a lil about this handsome boy! I wish I had got him earlier so I could clip him and show him off in his pretty clothes, but the weather is getting a bit chilly, so you’ll have to settle for shaggy, rutty buck pictures instead.
He is SO SWEET and easy to handle….. I’ve never met a buck with a more laid back disposition. His first night here, he busted out, got in with the does, and bred Rosie, a NUBAIN……..but even that lil stunt couldn’t make me mad at this sweet boy. The following day (October 13th) he also bred Mocha, Tori, Tricks and Bleuberry (the Alpine). So he wasted no time getting to work and made the rounds tagging at least one doe from every breed I own… Not exactly thrilled with that, but I’m flexible and can work around it, so no worries.
Avatar & Rosie enjoying a bit of inter-breed, forbidden love….
Most of my Lamanchas have quite a bit of South Fork in them…… I love their animals, and Mr. Avatar just so happens to have a bit of South-Fork in his family tree too….. Here’s a lil picture pedigree for this handsome boy. His dam is the very lovely South-Fork Sweet Xcite, and if ya can believe it, she’s even prettier in person.
Avatar’s Grandsire: Altrese Almost Legal
Avatar’s Dam: South-Fork Sweet Xcite
Avatar’s Maternal Granddam: GCH South Fork TT Sweet Treat
Avatar’s grandsire: Kastdemur’s Twist of Fate
Avatar’s sire: *B Little Orchard TF Xavier
Avatar’s paternal granddam: GCH Little Orchard BR Pia
I am just smitten with this boy… I really think he’ll compliment my girls nicely and am so excited by the possible improvements he’ll bring to my herd. Thanks so much Lynne for trusting this handsome boy into my care!
Five months is such a long, long wait….Cross your fingers and hope for golden lil doelings for me!
Can. Not. Wait. For. Kidding. Season!